A Letter To Writers Of All Ages Who Want To Publish

Focus On Your Craft. You Became A Writer To Tell Stories. Believe In Yourself. Stay Grounded. Longevity Matters More Than Virality. Avoid Social Media. You Deserve Genuine Friends. Never Stop Writing.

Dear Writer,

Have you eaten today? Have you cried today? How are you feeling?

It is all right to take a break. It is all right if you have not written a single word today. No, you are not a failure for not meeting an arbitrary word count. And you are not a failure for choosing your craft over algorithmic exposure. And really, you did not become a writer to break yourself online in exchange for five fleeting seconds of a stranger’s attention.

Why do you feel like you have to sacrifice your own needs? There must have been a part of you that wanted to shout your truth despite societal shackles. That part must still be inside you, a shining ball of light guiding you through your darkest hours. Why should you stop? Why can you not be appreciated as you are? Why does it seem like everyone else is a part of something while you are out there suffering all alone?

But yet, you have not given up. No matter how society had tried to erase you. A part of you refused to bow. A part of you love yourself even though you tell everyone that you cannot stand yourself. You know that you deserve better than what you had been through. The jeers. The sneers. The liars and bullies and naysayers. You are not going to back down just because other people do not understand you.

You know how I know this about you?

Well, you became a writer, didn’t you?

You are trying to find someone out there who would understand.

Maybe this is your last-ditch effort, and you are on the verge of really quitting.

Please do not quit. Please keep writing. Please know that you matter even if you feel lonely and ostracized and misunderstood and invalidated and hated.

Not everyone has given up on you.

Because you found this article.

I do not use social media, nor do I partake in any form of promotional activities. I merely tap into the energies of Higher Planes and write from my heart. There is no way that you would have found this article if you are not meant to see it.

But your intention and commitment had triggered this synchronicity, and now that you are here, it is time for you to hear this message.

You do not exist to cater. You did not come here to be an indentured servant.

And if you are seeking to publish, I offer you some food for thought. Hopefully, you will feel better, even just for a little while.

So without further ado, let us dive in.

ㅤ

01. Focus On Your Craft

So many people dream of writing a book. Yet, most people die without ever attempting to put pen to paper. Your choice to even commit to a short piece of writing, even if it is just a few sentences that you find to be terrible, you are still doing something that most dreamers would never actually do.

Consider Newton’s First Law of Motion. An object at rest stays at rest, and an object in motion will stay in linear motion, unless a force is acted upon this object to change its course. And the tendency to resist change is called inertia.

Whether you wrote 300 words, 30 words, or even just 3 words, you have defeated inertia by choosing the pen. If a book is 60,000 words, and you write 300 words a day, then you will have a book that is 60,000 words in 200 days, which is roughly six and a half months.

A tiny snowflake may not seem like much. But ten thousand snowflakes can blanket your driveway in a matter of mere hours.

So celebrate your wins.

Victory is built in drops and moments.

ㅤ

02. You Became A Writer To Tell Stories

How old were you when you first read the book that changed your life? Were you in middle school, bored out of your mind during math class, tired of dealing with insecure bullies who take their frustration out on you? Were you in your late-30s, weary of working a meaningless day job and craving to do something more? Were you in your 40s, 50s, or 60s, having been through too much grief and loss that you want an outlet to hear yourself think? Or perhaps, you were not inspired by a book at all. Maybe it was your favorite childhood show that inspired you. Or maybe, it was your grandfather, or your mother, or your sibling, or your neighbor.

Maybe you were so fed up with systemic injustice, so livid upon witnessing the inhumane treatment forced upon your kin and community, that you just knew you had to say something about it, and that you had something to say.

Regardless of your writer origin story, all of you started because you wanted to write down your thoughts, explore your feelings, take a stand, speak up for yourself and others, make a difference, find like-minded people, build a community, share the stories that we all can relate to because we are all humans.

When you started writing, you probably did not say this to yourself: “I cannot wait to spend all my time marketing books on social media and be pressured to fake-cry and dance on camera and deal with an industry that does not have my back and get cyberbullied by clowns who refuse to take accountability for their own problems, all the while being underappreciated, overworked, and underpaid!”

So please, return to your core. Your origin.

Why did you start writing? Why did you keep going?

And why would you stop because someone else refused to respect you?

It is not your job to teach them manners and compassion.

So keep doing you. And do not yield.

ㅤ

03. Believe In Yourself

Everyone is born for a reason. If you are meant to be someone else, then you would not be you. Nobody was born with self-hatred. Shame is often a response to abuse, harassment, and disrespect from those who rejected their own soul. But remember, their unhealed wounds are not yours to remedy. Their shame is not your burden to bear. Their problems are not for you to solve. Their crimes are not your life sentence.

Nobody should have to suffer the consequences of someone else’s failures.

Remember, dear writer, only you know your true intention. Your intention informs your decision, which sparks your actions, which define your character. A person’s reputation is just the amalgamation of external interpretation, and often times, it is the combination of external misinterpretation.

Nobody can tell you who you are. The people who try to force their opinions onto you are merely projecting from their ego. How can anyone else tell you how to express yourself and live your life when they are not you, and they will never become you?

Publishing is rife with narcissists who exploit the vulnerabilities of real writers and who want to give off the image of being a writer for external validation.

Remember that narcissists do not actually love themselves. They project a false persona of confidence to lure in empathetic and compassionate people, then the narcissists drain the good people of their energy to fuel their own internal void, then the narcissists launch smear campaigns in an attempt to alter other people’s perceptions of you, all the while undermining your confidence and self-esteem to make you feel inferior.

As a friend said to me: “Narcissists are one-story buildings who want to bulldoze all the skyscrapers around them so they could appear as the tallest in a field of ruin.”

Do not let any narcissist dissuade you from being your authentic, loving, beautiful self. Remember, the narcissist is afraid of you. They hate themselves, and they wish they could be as kind and talented as yourself. But they never will be, which is why they try their hardest to shift the blame onto you, gaslight you into questioning your worth, and refusing to take accountability when you call them out.

Being the target of a narcissist’s smear campaign can feel incredibly isolating, especially when they manage to alter other people’s perception of you. The narcissist will call you the narcissist, and they will often gang up on you with a group of other people in an attempt to intimidate you from putting yourself out there.

But remember, people who genuinely care for you will never put you down to make themselves look superior. People who truly respect you will stand by you and listen to you throughout the storm.

And keep loving yourself.

Self-love is a beautiful thing and the necessary key to self-actualization. Self-love is not the same as narcissism despite what popular media claims. Narcissus from Greek mythology did not love himself. He merely loved a false persona in the form of his reflection in the water, which is not his real, authentic self.

People who love themselves are fulfilled, and they radiate the light of love to all those around them. Sure, they may occasionally have a bad day like every other human, and they will most definitely make mistakes in their lives because they are mortal after all. But people who love themselves will always own up to their mistakes, learn from their errors, take accountability, and move forward with even more wisdom to write and share than before.

People who love themselves feel no need to compete for external validation because they know who they are. They will empower and uplift others. They will not put others down because there is no need to. Self-love originates from within, not from any perceived relation to another, or any mental comparison to strangers.

As the Chinese proverb goes: 满壶全不响，半壶响叮当。

A teakettle that is full does not make any sound, but a half-filled teapot will make plenty of noise.

So please, do not internalize the shame of narcissists who refuse to take responsibility for their own healing. You are here to write your own books. You have a right to thrive, and you have a right to express yourself. You do not need permission from anyone else, and you certainly do not need to fear. Most narcissists in publishing are chronically online because nobody offline wants to deal with them. And the people who truly care about you will always stay no matter what.

Nobody can keep you down unless you let them. So do not let them.

Choose yourself. Feel your valid feelings. Vulnerability is true strength. The denial of one’s own feelings are what creates abusers and narcissists. Great, timeless writing originates from the heart and soul, from the spiritual waters of sensitivity and emotions. Only people who are committed to Self-Love and healing, who accept their own emotions and empower others, are people capable of writing good stories that touch human hearts.

So surround yourself with people with Self-Love and heal together.

You have something important to say, so let us hear it.

ㅤ

04. Stay Grounded

Go outside. Drink water. Eat. Sleep. Breathe in. Breathe out.

Call your friends and relatives. Watch a movie. Take a stroll in the park.

Do self-care. Buy yourself a little treat. Walk your dog. Read a book. Stroke your cat.

Take a shower. Take a bath. Take a break.

You cannot write without your health.

You cannot do anything if you are on the verge of death.

ㅤ

05. Longevity Matters More Than Virality

It is all right to not have something published before you turn 25. Some of the greatest writers from history did not publish until middle age or later. Furthermore, some of the so-called writing prodigies did not write their magnum opus until they were in their 30s and 40s. Others did not even publish in their lifetime at all. And a lot of authors who we honor today saw little recognition while alive.

And do note that the earliest writings were anonymous. The writers did not care for fame. They simply wrote, and to this day, their stories continue to touch hearts across generations and the globe. And a lot of Medieval composers were also anonymous.

And if you are a young writer who feel discouraged or alienated, please know that you also have something worthwhile to say. Age is not the equivalent of experience. I have been researching and writing for twelve years. For the past five years, I had been experimenting with different modes of publishing whether it is traditional publishing, small press publishing, social publishing, and independent publishing.

Over the past 12 years, I have written at least a million words on three laptops and filled dozens of notebooks with handwritten paragraphs. My lifelong passion project is Wheel-37, which is a spiritual megaverse of twelve realms that celebrate diverse communities reclaiming their power. I have many books planned for the next few decades, and I have no desire to announce them until the time comes for release.

I have never stopped writing since I started, nor will I ever quit.

The only things that I have published during the past 12 years were a handful of poems in various literary magazines, two music projects, and a poetry book that celebrates literature while honoring real justice. I did not even publish the 200+ page memoir that I wrote because frankly, publication does not give writing its worth.

You do.

And you are worth it regardless of what society says.

And your writing has inherent worth no matter what.

As for the people who tell you that you are not a real writer because you do not fit their definition of what they think a writer should be, they would not make good writers because they are failing to understand that reality is infinite in its variety, and social constructs are not reality. And such people fail at empathizing with another’s journey, nor are they exercising the critical thinking necessary to understand that there is no one-size-fit-all solution to any creative endeavor. So there is no need to take their nonsense to heart. Write from your center instead.

As for all that noise about external accolades and sales and social media algorithms and whatnot, allow me to demonstrate a mindset built upon peace and contentment.

I am 22. I got rejected by 50+ literary agents in July 2022. I got 3 full requests, 2 of them from big-name literary agents working at big-name literary agencies. The majority of rejections were form-based, but I received quite a few personalized rejections from agents who told me the following things:

“Your writing is so emotional and touches me on a deep level. But I am so sorry that I cannot offer representation because I do not know how to sell your book or market you.”

“Wow, I truly do not want to do this since your writing is really wonderful, but I really have no editorial vision for this. Please consider querying me for your next writing project.”

“I truly enjoyed reading this 100-page sample. But unfortunately, I am not able to take you on as a client right now. Please check with [Recommended Agent] to see if she is open for queries as of right now. I really hope she offers you representation.”

As for the full requests, I got a form rejection on one of them, and I withdrew from the other two. Soon after, I deleted my query email, and I called it a day.

I am relieved that I did not end up getting an offer of representation from a literary agent, and I am very glad that I did not keep pursuing traditional publishing. The last time I saw a young writer getting a book deal, I remember feeling nothing but absolute relief that it was not me.

I love writing for the sake of it, and I have a lot of projects lined up for the future. I do not write to make sales, chase clout, or build an audience. Frankly, I do not care if people read my books or not. I only publish to release my stories as an act of self-expression and to take up space. After all, Chinese women are often expected to sit down and shut up. I am standing and I will never stop speaking.

Due to my personal values and goals, I choose independent publishing. I am my own editor, cover designer, interior layout designer, and publisher. Not only that, I also independently release music, poetry, podcasts, music videos, and more.

Because I am an indie creative, I will never be a bestseller. Why? Because I do not have any contacts working in media industries, nor do I waste my time on social media trying to entertain random people whom I will never meet, nor do I partake in any form of marketing. My time is limited. And I’d much rather spend time with my loved ones and friends than dance in front of a camera with my books or try to court the favor of people whom I will never meet offline.

I will never win any accolades or awards because those so-called prestigious institutions are nothing more than social constructs, and they do not consider independent creatives for their awards. I will never go on tour, nor will I be invited as a guest speaker at a school, nor will I speak on panels at conferences and conventions, nor will I ever host a book signing, nor will I ever be stocked at bookstores and be put on prominent display, nor will I ever have a fandom, nor will I ever be on any lists that claim to compile the greatest writers and books of all time.

And I am very content with all of that. In fact, I am incredibly grateful to have liberated myself from the algorithm, from the industry, and from the unsolicited opinions of picky strangers whom I do not write for.

At the end of the day, most writers only want to write for the rest of their lives. But this current economic climate forces writers to choose between their hearts and stomachs, and you cannot make words with an empty stomach. But the reality is that most writers, probably at least 90% of writers, will never make a living off of writing alone. So if you want to get rich really fast, pursue something technical instead.

But you see, since most writers only want to keep writing, someone who gets to do just that without fretting over the industry and the algorithm and cyberbullies and whether they can say this-or-that will always be a lot happier than someone whose mental health is being shredded to pieces by external noise that forces them to betray their own soul.

I spoke with a photographer a while back, and we touched on the importance of longevity. How long can you keep doing what you want to do? A blazing literary darling who burns too bright and soon burns out will never be timeless. Because the heat was too much for them to handle, and they will most likely spend the rest of their lives being forced to attempt to recreate that initial spark to the detriment of their literary growth and spiritual revolution.

On the contrary, Emily Dickinson only published around 10 of her 1800+ poems during her lifetime. She did not intend to publish at all. She even instructed her sister to burn her writing upon her demise. But her sister did not listen. And nowadays, Emily Dickinson is recognized for her literary prowess that her contemporaries scoffed at. In fact, all the greatest minds in history were visionaries shunned by their contemporaries.

So look ahead instead of drowning in the digital cesspit.

And I encourage you to stop calling yourself an “aspiring” writer simply because you did not publish anything. The moment you put your words down is the moment you ceased to aspire and started to write.

And most viral content fade into obscurity within two weeks. Every day, someone is going viral. But not everyone gets honored as a great writer every time someone goes viral. In fact, most people wrinkle their noses at social media.

So choose longevity over virality.

And you will thrive.

ㅤ

06. Avoid Social Media

You really do not need social media to thrive as a writer.

In fact, most of your favorite writers are not on social media.

Three years ago, I had 1400+ followers on Twitter. Two years ago, I had almost 800 followers on TikTok. Now I have 0 followers on all social media because I no longer use social media.

Three years ago, I almost stopped writing because I spent all my time trying to build a platform, only to be harassed by people who claimed to support underrepresented voices. Two years ago, I was so depressed because the digital cult formed around publishing really needs to learn that the true meaning of social justice is not cyberbullying writers and readers who refuse to conform to what they think social justice is.

You see, social justice is about empowerment, inclusivity, and integrity. Virtue signaling is not real activism. The purity spiral in those digital spaces is what creates a cult, not a culture of diversity. And don’t get me started on people who send death threats to authors, then slander authors as “unprofessional” when we stand up for ourselves. What is really unprofessional is perpetuating such foul harassment and refusing to take responsibility.

Anyways, with all this noise, how can you focus on your book?

And people who claim to champion social justice with one breath, then make 20 sockpuppet accounts to dogpile authors are just oppressors in denial. And reviewers are not cyber-abusers. Reviewers are readers who have every right to discuss a book. Abusers are people who cannot handle how much they hate themselves, so they project their problems onto you by hurling slurs and launching smear campaigns, and when you call them out for it, they suddenly claim to be a mere reviewer, then blame you for their wrongdoings.

So stay off social media. Write what you want. Most people in real life do not care about what the chronically online say on Twitter or Goodreads. They just read your book. And remember, traditional publishing houses are not social media. Independent publishing is not the equivalent of social media. Writing a book is not the same as being a social media influencer. If someone is good at making content, then they are a good content creator. That does not necessarily mean they are also a good writer, so do not feel bad about yourself for not using social media.

If using social media is what makes someone a writer, then the billions of people who use social media around the world must all be writers, and the people who died before the invention of social media must not be real writers then, right?

Wrong.

Go write your book.

ㅤ

07. You Deserve Genuine Friends

Genuine friends will not put you down to make themselves look better. Genuine friends will not be envious of your achievements, and they will not belittle your work. Genuine friends will not tell you what to do, violate your boundaries, or expect you to serve them while shaming your needs. Genuine friends will not only reach out when they need you to do something for them or only when it is convenient for them.

Genuine friends will support you and respect your boundaries. Genuine friends will honor your autonomy and listen without judgement. Genuine friends will cheer you on and be real with you at the same time. Genuine friends befriend you for who you are, not for their own agenda or reputation.

So surround yourself with genuine friends, and you will feel a lot better.

ㅤ

08. Never Stop Writing

You started for a reason.

So why stop?

But if you truly want to stop writing, that is all right. Just make sure you are choosing to stop because you want to stop, not because someone else is afraid of what you have to say.

And if you want to keep writing, then do it.

The world needs your stories, even if that world is just yourself.

But chances are, there are at least a thousand people out there who feel the same way you do, so why count yourself out?

Be brave. Be true. Be you.

ㅤ

Best Wishes,

Feifei Z

---

The cover photo of this blog post (Black-Eyed Susans) was taken by Feifei Z in June 2023.